An Ode to TASKMASTER

Taskmaster is a British TV series that began airing in 2015. It's a panel game show like the American Hollywood Squares or Match Game, if they were conducted by a host from hell. A show whose bedrock is mayhem, embarrassment, and hilarity. It isn't readily streaming on any service in the States, nor is it airing on any network or broadcast channels. That being an absolute shame because it fucking rules.

The basic premise is thus: the Taskmaster and his assistant, Alex Horne, bring together five comedians to compete in various solo and team tasks. Points are awarded per each task's rules, numbers are tallied, and eventually there is a show and series winner. The bones are simple. The body is not.

Because it's filled with comedians, even the straightforward tasks can get off the rails. Add to that Horne's ability to easily pivot from mundane to insane, the Taskmaster Greg Davies' comedic skills in studio, and you've got a solid hour of madness.

If you aren't sold yet, allow me to provide some examples for the heights this show can reach. Starting at that simple, unadorned bedrock, Horne can ask the contestants to do something easy like eat an egg as fast as possible. Or, showcase your most valuable item. Or even something as silly as bringing in something that makes the most excellent noise. Again, with the contestants being comedians, this can go in many different directions. Like when Horne asked the contestants to bring the in their best chair...

And there is the full spectrum. Adefope and Fielding bringing in a massive bean bag and an upholstered David Bowie chair, respectively. Both being something I kind of want. The heartwarming submissions from Dennis and Giedroyc: a "chair" for a young son and the miniature seat of one Phillip Pennyfield. And to close the span, Lycett making something that is demonstrably not a chair at all.

While it can be (mostly) straightforward as the above, Horne will also throw in a serious curveball. Sometimes it's a small loop of syntax, and sometimes it's Koufax-ian. In that same series, he began the task by asking the funny five to make the most "exotic" sandwich...

It's so simple. And poor Giedroyc writes her gravestone in the preamble. "That to me says maybe fillings that have never been seen in a sandwich before." Her confidence, her excitement, both quickly demolished when the second part of the task is cruelly delivered via lunchbox. "Oh gang," she says. Falling right into Horne's trap, like an M&M into a nostril. If it wasn't so hilarious, it would be sad to watch.

Horne truly is a master of curating mayhem. Sometimes by making the task so ridiculous they have no choice but jump right into that pool, and sometimes by simply trusting them to wade the audience into it. Like in the very first episode of the show, when he asked the contestants to simply eat as much watermelon as possible...

Conaty's hilariously slow decision making notwithstanding, Skinner, Key, and especially Ranganathan literally smash into it. I completely lose my mind every time the latter steps to the plate and inexplicably fastballs the melon into the floor. Horne finds other ways to accomplish this insanity. Like for another example, when he asked the contestants to simply eat as much watermelon as possible (eight series later)...

You see Cooper, hood over eyes, getting after it like a starved rat. Even Herring can't handle the antics of his task partner. The slo-mo only adding to an image that you may never get out of your head. A sedated nightmare of teeth and poncho. This type of comedic editing became a huge additive to the show, like when the darts "semi-pro" Vine is breaking down the logistics of the task while Howard simultaneously says fuck it and comes out swinging...

A man in a safari outfit, breaking down his approach of throwing 60 darts at a board 10 meters away against the punk rock, "Get in!" approach of immediate action. Only for the sympathetic switch when we learn the actual totals and find out Joey Ramone scored on a grand total of one of his darts for the paltry sum of 3. Masterful stuff. But the editing team truly gets in their bag on a task in which Horne prompts the contestants to simply show off...

O'Hanlon disappearing into the house while Christie seemingly loses her mind, asking for a gun and throwing sports balls into metal buckets like some sort of midway game for pre-k children. Meanwhile, Ramsey does something actually impressive by balancing various heavy items on his chin. Only for O'Hanlon to return after 14 of the 20 minutes have elapsed, hair inexplicably covered in glitter, and do exactly what Ramsey already did at a much, much lower level. And then, the utter hilarity of Love reciting "impressive" facts about herself like the celebrities she's met, how she can fry four fish fingers at once, and the highly impressive accomplishment of having borrowed a dog. Juxtaposed against Duker cultishly reciting Shakespeare and then immediately getting into a tub handcuffed (as you do). The beauty of the edit is there again, but that is truly every single piece of the jigsaw fitting perfectly into place.

Now, Horne and the production team undoubtedly deserve a lot of praise, but as we've just seen the contestants can elevate the show above and beyond. Many factors are built into that magic, with even something as small as their interactions with Horne at the tasks doing comedic work (James Acaster did a bit where he refused to return Horne's "Hello" each task). There are other, bigger cogs as well, but lets begin with something else small. A task is given. The contestant needs to understand it immediately as it is usually timed. So, quick thinking is probably an asset you'd want...

A semi-complicated set up. One foot at all times, eat a sandwich if violated, an obstacle course, and finally that bugger of racing the clock. Lycett, Adefope, and Fielding go straight in, while Giedroyc does the same in a way that required a meal's worth of bread. The quick thinking of Dennis — armed with a blade for the umpteenth time in his series — streamlined his course to Horne, required minimal eating, and allowed the best view of his hopping technique. It only netted him second place points, but the style, oh my. Immediate smarts are a great club for any contestant to have the in bag, but the series is fertile soil for all forms of creativity. Love is not only able to recite facts about herself, but also is a world-class bullshitter. Pretty much any prize task in S13 will provide evidence to that, including the finale's in which she attempts to submit a vial of her own blood as a family heirloom...

It's as if she doesn't even know what she's submitted, and must defend it anyway. Like a surprise from Horne each show that she is scrambling to jump in front of like a cadet on a trench grenade. Innovation in voice needs pairing with it in action, too. And in such we have various, often yellow examples. Sometimes involving ducks, or a "banana", or multiple bananas (in about the grossest way possible).

Honestly, there's examples of the lot in every episode. The format leads itself into rooms of the things often left behind in childhood. Like the above in terms of lateral thinking and a complete abandonment of social norms for the sake of creativity. These rooms the innards of a technicolor mansion, each facet occupying its own floor within. The studio show occupying the main floor, allowing the contestants to show off their creative wares in front of an audience to feelings of pride, joy, and hilarity.

But, as any physical comedian has the bruises to prove, that hilarity comes with a tax. The bitter to that better is despair, anger, occasional insanity, and — due to it being a game and all games requiring some level of it — luck. Again, Horne and production are there to elevate these emotional states even higher. Occasionally, this leads to the audience being ahead of the contestant's soon-to-be anguish, like when we see the killer coming up behind a teenage victim in a slasher film. Or, a ball slowly beginning its roll down a hill...

Sisyphus on a panel show. A re-watch of which, when seen in comparison to how the others handled it with more brain, can lead to a different emotion: embarrassment. A solid pairing with despair, especially when a contestant is singled out...

"This task has overshadowed five months of my life," Watson pleads. The yields of which are hilarious for the audience, but a grueling exercise for Watson to execute 150 times. Chiefly when a minor stumble in its execution can lead to no reward. No, the show never leans into that chain of events...

Wilkinson displaying the full and complete spectrum. The utter smugness in the studio. The actual pride and tears in his accomplishment not only being seen, but recorded. And, like that blade into the teenager's back, the complete and groveling despair of it all being taken away. The vote is cruel, and also bias considering what's to be gained with a vote of no. That unfairness is also something the show would never lean into on a regular basis...

Such brilliance in that structure. Horne and Co. knowing pre-flop that the seven mini-tasks having no stated order would lead to...emotional responses from the contestants. Haven't we all been Gamble at some point in our lives? Frustrated beyond belief at the luck of it all, raving at superiors about things that actually don't matter but feel like they mean everything, simply due to our investment in effort. His karma is reversed when the unfair light switch is flipped on his co-contestants, but that anger is so, so palpable. It is also so, so common for obvious reasons. Sometimes out of pure frustration at the task, causing one to yell at things as beautiful and innocent as bubbles. Or, as Gamble demonstrated often throughout his entire series, as a device to "motivate" a teammate.

Gamble's is indeed angry, but you can also see how dangerously close he is to a full scale breakdown into insanity. Baddiel is just so clearly on a different wavelength of creativity and competitiveness than his partner, and it is also clear from the jump that Gamble knows this. But insanity isn't always the end result of anger, sometimes it's just, there? Just who you are. Just an instinctual reaction when given the simple prompt to surprise someone...

The most insane reactions being those at the beginning, and mercifully the kidnapping wasn't acted on. But you have to admit a semi-nude gong show and crossed-dressed grandma power wash are, at the very least, a bit divorced from sanity. But the cake (maybe even the bakery) has to be taken by Chowdhry. Armed with a refrigerator box, a bloody hatchet, and some clown make up, he inexplicably spends forty-five minutes in said box waiting for Horne. I'm assuming he used that time to question every decision he'd made up until that point, but also maybe he just sat there in a fugue state of red-nosed psychosis. Great entertainment, but luckily it's also not permanent...

Such a result could easily be categorized in the innovation or creativity bucket, but tattooing another man's name on you definitely feels more at home amongst the crazy. Even Chowdhry and his extra minutes couldn't have approached this level of surprise. Imagine having the competitive juices flowing at a level so high you think it's a rational decision to do that? Or to tie Alex to a chair, or make Alex sit bareassed on a cake, or break into Davies' house in the middle of the night to film him sleeping. Insanity in spades.

Point of this all being, the show does stuff to people. They react, create, innovate, hit all emotions, and it all gets packaged by a production team for our enjoyment. There are 14+ series of examples for each category, some of which have incredible cast chemistry (S12), or just the individual personalities to showcase this spectrum (like the above shown Love and Giedroyc, Acaster in S07, or Wozniak in S11). I'm just grabbing the first example that pops into my head for each facet.

But I would be remiss not to mention two in particular. Tasks that showcase the best of it all. Everything coming together to create the apex of what the show is trying to be and beyond. Both are shown below, and both are pretty much perfection.

No notes. You can watch full episodes of Taskmaster on YouTube, and I highly encourage you to do so.